An example in my life is a job interview I had recently. My brain wouldn’t shut up about what a wonderful opportunity it was. My body, on the other hand, was contracted and I felt like throwing up from the time I got the interview call all the way through the interview process. And as much as I tried to convince myself that it was a good fit for me, I just couldn’t shake off the warning signs of my body.
And so I tried something new, I listened.
I’ve found that my brain promotes fear and worry while my body promotes trust. For a long time I let my brain rule. I let what I assumed to be rational thought rule. When I felt something was wrong in my body, I let my brain step in as the navigation system. I’d make lists of why something was good for me when clearly my body was screaming out NO. I rationalized many of my decisions. I overlooked all of the body warning signals and I went ahead anyway.
I was driving with my check engine light on and it got me in
a lot of trouble. It resulted in a lot of tears, loss, disconnection and
sadness. And then I had to turn all that shit off, so I stopped
feeling altogether. And when you don’t
feel the shit, you don’t really feel the love and excitement either.
I was disconnected from myself, and as a result disconnected from everyone around me too. And now that I am reconnected, now that I REMEMBER what it
feels like to have your heart open to that warm, fuzzy, chest expansion
feeling. I’m trusting.
It’s not always rational. Actually a lot of the time it feels completely counter to what I should be doing. But as they say “Don’t should all over yourself.”
Instead, as two wise women recently told me:
TRUST OR BUST BABY!
It’s the only way to live. 